40 - Start the things
Because you never know until you try
I remember jumping from my exercise mat on the 5th of March last year to announce to my friend Dami that I was going to start a newsletter, and now here we are, a whole year later, writing/reading the 40th edition of said newsletter.
We (my friend and I) had been having one of our typical random conversations and I had mentioned how completing 75 hard and reading Atomic habits had caused a major shift in my perspective and I really wanted to share some of my discoveries but was worried about sounding preachy. It wasn’t until an hour after that conversation, (in the middle of my workout too) that the idea of a starting a newsletter came to me.
It seemed like a no brainer. After over a decade of writing semi regularly on my anonymous blog as well as a writing for an online health magazine for a few years, it was time for me to take my writing more seriously, in preparation for the books I intend to publish one day.
This didn’t stop the usual doubts and excuses from creeping up.
How would I start
Would I have the time
What if no one likes it
What if my friends laugh at me
And so on.
At the time, I had just finished reading You Are a Badass at Making Money: Master the Mindset of Wealth by Jen Sincero. In the book, Jen referred to the subconscious mind as “The Little Prince” whose number one concern is survival. And so whenever we even consider any act that involves risk, the Little Prince tires to protect us by giving us all the reasons why we shouldn’t.
The subconscious mind’s number one concern is survival. As a little baby who can’t take care of or fend for itself, losing love and being abandoned literally equals death, so anytime we come near to putting ourselves at risk, the Little Prince goes crazy and tries to stop us. This is one of the main reasons we stay stuck in lives we’re not nuts about - we don’t wanna risk trying and failing, trying and succeeding, losing weight, getting rich, having a new opinion, a new love life, a new strut in our step for fear the people we love will reject us when we change. While this may work for a little kid who’s doing the best he can to survive, it sucks for an adult.
So this time, when my Little Prince showed up, I recognised and ignored it.
“Some people keep asking for more information and what they’re trying to do is drive uncertainty to zero so that there’s really not a question on the right course of action because you know everything.” But you can’t do that. It’s not achievable. So they become hesitant. They become tentative, and they become focused on getting more and more information to ratchet the uncertainty out of the situation and they don’t act." - General Stanley McChrystal
Many times, we get stuck in a cycle of over preparing - taking one more certification, buying new gear, saving more money- when the one thing that can truly prepare you is taking those first few steps, no matter how tentative.
“Once you start taking action you’ll be able to discover more things you like, more things you don’t like, and a clearer picture of what you desire to do will begin to form. Taking action leads to answers, mulling ideas around in your head forever leads to indecision and grouchiness.” - Jen Sincero
There are many days when I sit before my computer and have nothing to write. I still worry about some of the things I share sounding silly or preachy, but I’ve shown up regardless and for that I am incredibly proud of myself.
Stop mulling and just START.
This week I am reading
30 Days to Better Habits - A simple step-by-step guide for forming habits that stick by James Clear. It’s a 30 day program to help you build new habits, complete with printable workbooks.
The days are getting longer and the sun is making more of an appearance these days so I am happy. Also having two consecutive weekends off work have helped me feel like myself again.
Here’s wishing you a week of silencing all your doubts and starting the things.
Chioma.